Only together are we independent
Every leap you take, you take it together. To strengthen your corner of the country this Independence Day, start with your community.
In 2011, I decided to quit my job and become an independent business owner. The full-time job I held at the time no longer worked with the life I wanted to create for myself and my family. I knew I wanted more time—with my family, my friends, my community. And I knew I wanted to contribute what I could to my corner of the planet.
I had been brewing up the idea of CoffeeSock, and I was ready to make a go of it. And I haven’t looked back since. Do you know what else I haven’t done?
I haven’t been independent.
An interdependent business
My family and friends were there cheering me on, even helping to cut and sew those early socks. Then there was my Sock team, a group of amazing makers out creating their own stories when they weren’t at the factory bringing the business to life. (You can meet them, here!)
And of course there was and is the coffee community, from the shop owners and baristas who championed our product and helped make it better, to the roasters and distributors. And yes, the coffee drinkers who were thirsty for a more sustainable, simple and ritualistic way to enjoy their brew.
The truth is, no person or business is ever fully independent. No family and no community is fully independent. We rely on each other. Sometimes a little and sometimes a lot.
We are interdependent. And we celebrate that beautiful fact this July (and every month, really).
Independence requires stronger ties
What does it mean to be independent? Does it mean you do everything yourself? Does it mean you never rely on anyone else? Does it mean you have no limitations or outside controls?
I don’t think so. Not exactly. To be independent means to understand the nature of your ties and choose them for yourself. It means you choose to whom you are bound, on whom you rely, what limitations and controls you freely accept as a means to live the life you choose.
It might sound strange to say that you can be freely bound. But it’s true. As a mother and wife and daughter and sister, I choose to bind myself to my family in ways that support and nurture them and me. This may sometimes mean I take on burdens and limitations that strain me in the moment. It also means that we all can rely on each other in turn, as we need it.
It’s pretty obvious to see with children and elders. They can enjoy more freedoms and choices the more community they have to support them. Our elders can enjoy independence for longer when we support them more frequently. Our children can grow more independent when we provide the scaffolding and limits they need to succeed.
And it’s true for all of us, regardless of age and ability. We are each more free and independent because of our ties.
To strengthen your corner of the country this Independence Day, strengthen your community
These last few years, few months, few weeks—they have been EXTRA. At times, I have felt hopeless and wondered if we are irreparably broken and divided as a society. In those times, I find great solace in my chosen communities. Those whom I live with and near, and those much farther away who I connect to through my business or our shared love of beekeeping or sustainability.
I find solace in the Earth herself, my beloved Texas beaches and the forests and mountains I visit every chance I get.
These places and people make up my community, and in my moments of deepest doubt, they lift me up and make me stronger and remind me to grow myself and grow my community.
If you’re reading this, you are part of it too. Thank you for making me stronger and more independent. May you be stronger in your ties and grounded in your independence, too.